二十歲 I’m 20
We change as we do.
目錄 Catalogue⚪ 前言 Foreword⚪ English Story⚪ 「拾光系列」全 (Continue Reading this Series) 👏👏🏻👏🏽
前言 Foreword
Hello, readers on Medium. Although I label myself as a bilingual writer on this platform, I couldn't piece together this post in Chinese.
Three days ago was my 20th birthday and I didn’t make a wish. Without a proper celebration in times of pandemic, I appreciated more of my nights spent with friends and family. I went to a shop listening to vinyl records, had dinner, and cut the cake with my family. The past three months since I came to Taiwan from Armenia were chaotic. New tides took shape to introduce a new lifestyle. I rode along them thinking it would be easy, but God knows how difficult it has been!
Yesterday morning, I managed to watch Hirokazu Koreeda’s After Life (1998) on Youtube. It reminded me of how important memories are to shape life. In a sudden rush to escape my apartment in the afternoon, I went out and rode a bike to the Museum Park. I captured this frame of a golden hour at its finest because I went out at the right time. If I were a bit late, the sun would’ve set. Throughout a minute, hour, day, week, and month in this coming year, I wish to capture all good moments in their golden hours.
Over the last two years, I haven’t been able to meet many deadlines. To finish this series, titled Picking Up The Light (拾光), was a promise I made to myself before my 20th birthday. I’m proud to finish these very important entries to my life. Hear/Here the story unfolds, cheers!
English Story
I thought my 20-year-old birthday would be a lot special. When I was 18, I spent my birthday camping at a lake, and then the next one with my quarantine bubble. People prepared posters, cake, and pizza to celebrate it with me. This year, the thought of my age beginning with a 2 startled me. It is my symbol of maturity, responsibility, and inching closer to integrate with society. Through the sleepless nights, I guess I just didn’t want to be a 20-year-old.
Last year, people asked me, “how do you feel about turning 19?”
“I wouldn’t know until I complete it. Let’s see how it is when it reached its end!”
I’m starting my 20-year-old birthday like any other day. I will bike in the morning, read a few pages of a novel, and teach my student a lesson on making presentations. After many years of public speaking, I’m glad to have the chance to translate my skills to those who need them. After posting my resume on four different platforms in Taiwan, I’ve been able to come in contact with perfect strangers willing to give me an opportunity. Besides, I always thought that I would not tutor. It turns out that engaging my student in their work is a rewarding task. Many people believe that making slides is easy, but many elements are involved, such as color, icon, layout, typeface, and more exciting features to help us elevate words into aesthetics. I told my student that slides are only full of inert elements until the presenter brings them alive. I’m excited to teach my second lesson and wait for my student to speak against my beliefs if necessary.
Continue Reading｜Back to CatalogueAs I walk into the bathroom to begin my morning routine, I will watch my face in the mirror and utter, “it changed.” For a long time, I suffered from acne problems which began with a zit in Grade 6. The problem fluctuated in severity over the seven years of my life.
Unfortunately, it’s hard for us to touch upon the collective social anxiety toward our looks. Faces are like the first entrance into the portal of our minds. Judging by social norms, they should be pristine, flawless, or at the least presentable for the general audience. I watched how these norms suppress me at a young age.
Pimples appeared on my face & body at a rapid pace, no matter how clean my diet was. I rarely drank sugary drinks nor went to fast food chains. People could be mean — just as someone had once called me ugly. I tried to brush aside mean comments, unaware of the damage it has done to my self-identity. I used to look down upon myself until the past two years that made a significant, positive change in my life. I realized that commenting on someone’s looks can be a warm gesture for providing tips for skincare or nutrition. Meanwhile, you run into certain people who feel entitled to judge your looks like they are better than you. Reaching out requires courage, and if you ever do encounter someone with acne issues approaching you for suggestions, it is a bond of trust.
I hope that we live in a world where nobody has a face. However, we can hear each other’s voices. By removing visual features, I wonder how human connections will play out then. Now that I’m 20, I will continue nourishing my inner (and outer) self so that becoming a better person is the overall objective.
Here’s my footnote for the past year:
A year’s worth of memories traveled afar with its entirety preserved. They became the wool that time continuously weaves into the fabric of life. A strand of misery feels coarse by hand, whereas joy made the wool textured and soft. Sometimes, I feel like a fool traveling upon this overstretching fabric that doesn’t see its end. The hands of time are steady and slow. They made sure the fabric is well-handled.
The fool, like we all are, wanders around the fabric to converse with our regrets, joy, and ordinary moments of bliss. As I look back upon this year’s flow of wool woven, irregular patterns have been a norm. In mid of restless upheavals, there is a range of precious moments worth revisiting. Every string of ‘moment’ contains an intricate label. It marks the time, place, and people that made worthy entries. These strings complete the fabric. Elements of intimacy made sure that the fabric glows even in the darkest of all nights. They are tightly woven until the strings loosen up or remain as such. In return, time is not all lost but documented.
Back to Catalogue「拾光系列」全 (Read this Series)
- Storin’ Film is a personal reflection on one’s relationship with arts, imagination, and creativity. 「捲底片」反思了我對於藝術、想像力與創意的觀感。
- About Happiness touches on mental wellbeing through a dialogue on cherishing little achievements and improving for the better. 「關於快樂」講述了在顧及身心健康下，如何將自己變得更好且享受時常平凡的快樂。
- Embracing Confidence walks through the anxieties of Gen Z, imposter syndrome, and ultimately, the power to overcome barriers. 「擁抱自信」談論了新世代的全體焦慮，冒牌者症候群，及去跨越這些亂七八糟之事情的力量。
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